Let’s take a moment to find our place. Look around. Here we are. You, where you are. Me, over here. Us.
What a wonder that we each have a place to be.
Notice a few details of this place. Maybe the colors. Maybe the sounds. Why is this important? Because this is how we find our place; every little detail of the moment arises in the place where you are.
These details are happening. They shape our experience of NOW and reconnect us to a deep truth of our reality: we only ever in this present moment. The past is a memory that replays. The future is an illusory potential. Sure, our minds time travel through these terrains but what they bring back is a well-painted rendering. Because we believe our minds, we fall for these fantasies. They become rich— often richer than the moment itself.
Truly, it is this place where we are— this point on the timeline— that needs our attention… and artistry.
In the last couple of posts, I shared some ideas about living a decent life, an artful life: a life of presence, a life of connection, a life that recognizes our shared abundance is love.
Too much?
Just enough. We have notions about love. We want it to be freely given. We may expect it to bring us enduring happiness. We demand it from some while withholding it from others. We wonder if love is fair. We worry over love.
How about this instead?
Love, as our shared wealth, is a bond between us. It connects us to each other and everything. And it exists in every moment. We don’t need to seek, only to see. We don’t even need to believe; it’s just there. Love persists without our awareness but our awareness gives us a way to realize it.
And its gifts.
So how about we pay attention and discover?
Consider with me whether and how we might dare to give attention to every moment. This isn’t for the weak-hearted. It requires that we find our place. We learn how to become still, to bring our attention to heel, to steady our focus. These three simple steps are taken against the tide of everything we consider normal behavior these days. Most of us are committed to remaining busy. Most of us don’t think we have control over our attention. Most of us are very distracted.
The tide will feel like a tsunami when we catch a glimpse of the function of these beliefs. Many of them support our ability to keep clear of timeless stories we carry as trauma. Funny thing that: we’ll carry our bugaboos, just don’t make us look at them.
This is the wealth of our lives: to attend to these bugaboos and discover in them the source of our survival, resilience, compassion, and wisdom. Our stabilized, calm attention brings these qualities home.
Because of our humanity, every moment carries the potential of overload: sensory overwhelm, emotional uprising, even behavioral revolution. Every moment opens up unexplored terrain and many of us prefer to know the route before we set out. In every moment, we see our best efforts to set a course overruled.
Still, we can choose the way we participate in it. From wherever we are, we decide to engage. We also choose the quality of our engagement. Our choice to be exactly who we are and where we are is the path to who we’ll become. We each hold that powerful choice. It is the choice to direct our attention.
This powerful choice can move our attention from mindlessness to mindfulness, from distraction to focus. We make a choice to stabilize our awareness. It takes practice. But the results are life-saving. With deliberate attention, we move ourselves from fear to curiosity, reaction to response, discomfort to acceptance.
So try this on for size. Remember, it’s a practice. As you prepare yourself to give attention to the moment, establish your place and choose to see the person you’re becoming. See her. Envision him. This version of you walks the path and becomes the destination.
Now, name that part of you ready to explore. You may also like to name that part of you whispering or yelling in the background, ‘don’t bother with this it’s so dumb and none of this makes any sense so who’s in my DMs?!’
I like to call my explorer Ernest, after my grandfather. I call the critical voice Marie for my grandmother, who never understood why I wanted to sing loud, dig holes, climb trees or wander off. Both of these voices are important and loving. I consider them allies contributing to the person I’m becoming. Ernest shows me my readiness; Marie points me to resistance.
These two are just a few of many parts we all share who organize themselves to create our personalities. At the center, of course, our hearts. But around these hearts, a lot of characters orbit to confine, protect or reveal the most beautiful aspects of us. They all have a purpose but they don’t always work together. It’s for us to ask for their cooperation. They all serve our hearts... some just do so in ways that no longer benefit the people we’ve become or intend to become.
Listening in to Ernest or Marie alone could (and has) put me in hot water. Because of old trouble, I could want to throw both of them out with the bath water. But their cooperation is a gift. To bring them together, I need to see them and understand their interests for me.
We can do this together. Let’s turn our attention to them.
First, consider how they offer protection. Ernest wants me to live a full life. Marie wants me to be safe. That’s good of them.
Then, I might introduce my intentions to them. I show them my potential. They love that. I teach them to understand the presence of each other and work together toward that potential.
I guide and appreciate them. I claim my sovereignty and let them know how grateful I am for their enduring love and loyalty. I love them as much as they love me.
Now you try.
By naming the explorer in the moment, we gain a little objectivity as well as the courage and curiosity that comes with it. By naming the critic, we discover how it may protect and withhold.
Imagine for a moment calling up the explorer and the reluctant traveler. Ask them to work together to discover the moment. Notice how you’re ready and safe. Now, with these qualities supporting you, notice the contours of this space in time. See the options appearing. With your awareness established in the moment, choose the option that supports the evolution of the person you want to be. Choose the step that the person you’re becoming would take toward the person you’re becoming.
Notice what’s different?
What we see in every moment is the million ways we might be truly responsive to the majesty of now. We see life in its tiny movements. We see ourselves in progress. Who knows what else we might find?
Certainly, it’s worthwhile to explore functional ways to organize our personalities toward a calm and cooperative purpose. Isn’t it also worthwhile to free our hearts so we can live a bit more artfully?
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